update

  • on pilgrimage in the local church | update/prayer requests 3/21/2011

    As part of my mission statement for deerlife, I had written the following (a synthesis of my very first post here plus what I wrote about deerlife on my other site here)…

    Through deerlife, I pray God might raise up a fellowship of believers here who can support, uphold and encourage one another, so we can be mobilized and sent back into our home churches and communities on mission for Him. I am praying that those of us who have had a taste of revival in our own lives would be able to take that into our churches. I know there are some of us who are specifically called to this blogging community, but all of us are called to build on the home front as well.

    I am also praying God would begin to raise up people in the local church to disciple and equip the saints both now and as revival does come, for there will be an influx of hungry souls needing meat. We should all be praying about our responsibility and role in that.

    I love the Church and want to see her glorify God as she is intended and that starts with each one of us! I am a strong advocate of every member ministry. As Christians, we are all ministers, we are all uniquely called and equipped by God to be serving Him, His people and our neighbor in love with the gifts and resources He provides for His glory. I am praying God would be gracious to us and allow us to encourage one another to live our lives to His glory in the places He has put us here on this earth.

    In the Church today the work is great and the work is widely spread. It is also crucial for us to come together because the world is united in opposition against Christ and against those who are seeking to do His will and seeking the welfare of His Church. We are separated on the wall, far from one another in many ways. I am praying God might be gracious to us here and work through Deerlife to equip, encouragement, edify His people as we seek to walk in the works God has ordained for us and build up His Body for His glory.

    In my communications with all believers, I am always continuing to encourage them to go into their own churches to actively serve…

    So, here I am now, being sent into my own church to actively serve… to practice what I have been preaching.

    I’ve written previously about the opportunity God was opening up in women’s ministry in our church (see the end of this post) and now that door is opening wider and the way seems to be coming clearer.

    I recently had a wonderful meeting with our church’s elders. (Thank you to those who had prayed!) I am especially thankful for their love for the Lord and His Word and that all of them take seriously the charge to guard the deposit of the Gospel and to be overseers of the flock of God purchased with the precious blood of Christ.

    I took an outline along with me that night, which I’ve fleshed out more here for you…

    Christianity – religion of the SOUL.

    Henry Scougal defined Christianity “the LIFE of God in the SOUL of man.”

    There is a great distinction between our knowing about God in general terms, with our understanding of the Christian doctrines as notion – as opposed to our intimately and experientially knowing God’s person, character and work directly for and in our own souls, Christianity then becoming more than notion (using Joseph Hart’s phrase – see the later part of this post), with the Biblical doctrines coming to be written on the heart by the Holy Spirit, producing burning hearts…

    Psalm 66:5 Come and see the works of God;
    He is awesome in His deeds toward THE CHILDREN OF MAN.

    Psalm 66:16 and hear, all you who fear God,
    and I will declare what He has done FOR MY SOUL.

    As I’ve written previously, using Whitefield’s words, my deep desire is that God would raise up “sweet knots of religious friends” throughout the Church, including in my own congregation.

    In his book “The Experience Meeting,” William Williams, an 18th century Welsh Calvinistic Methodist, describes the types of meetings that were being held during The Great Awakening in both Wales and England. In the Introduction to the book, Martyn Lloyd-Jones (who was instrumental in having the book translated into English, with the translation done by his wife Bethan) explains that in both Wales and England

    independently of each other, the leaders were led to gather together the converts into little groups or societies for further teaching and nurturing in the Faith. These men of God had a great concern for the souls of the people, and realising that the parish churches were so spiritually dead that they could provide neither the fellowship nor the teaching that was necessary for these raw converts, they developed the idea of ‘religious societies’ where such people could meet together regularly every week.

    The object of the societies was primarily to provide a fellowship in which the new spiritual life and experience of the people could be safeguarded and developed. The great emphasis was primarily on experience, and the experimental knowledge of God and His love and His ways. Each member gave an account of God’s dealings with him or her, and reported on any remarkable experience, and also their sins and lapses, and so doing compared notes with one another in these respects. The societies were not ‘bible study’ groups or meetings for the discussion of theology. Of course great stress was laid on reading the Bible as well as prayer, but the more intellectual aspects of the Faith were dealt with in the preaching services and not in the societies. Here, the emphasis was on daily life and living, the fight against the world, the flesh and the devil, and the problems in the Christian’s pilgrimage through this world of sin.

    Many of us know the book of Malachi for its exhortation to bring the tithe into the storehouse, but there’s a wonderful passage later in that third chapter which Williams used in his book (p. 17), a verse you may not have ever really noticed (I know I hadn’t).

    Malachi 3:16 Then they that feared the LORD spake often one to another: and the LORD hearkened, and heard it, and a book of remembrance was written before him for them that feared the LORD, and that thought upon his name. 17 And they shall be mine, saith the LORD of hosts, in that day when I make up my jewels; and I will spare them, as a man spareth his own son that serveth him. (KJV)

    I love this! Consider that as those who fear the LORD come together to speak to one another and meditate on His name, the LORD listens and hears us and a book of remembrance is written! Let us not minimize the pleasure God takes in our meeting together to speak of His life in our souls! He treasures such times as He treasures us!

    As it has today, much of Christianity in the 18th century had become lifeless, very similar to Jesus’ description here:

    John 5:39 You search the Scriptures because you THINK that in THEM you have eternal life; and it is they that bear witness ABOUT ME, yet YOU REFUSE TO COME TO ME that you may HAVE LIFE.

    And Jeremiah’s words:

    Jeremiah 2:11 “Has a nation changed its gods,
    Which are not gods?
    But My people have changed their Glory
    For that which does not profit.
    12  Be astonished, O heavens, at this;
    And be horribly afraid;
    Be very desolate,” says the LORD,.
    13  “For My people have committed two evils:
    They have forsaken ME,
    THE FOUNTAIN OF LIVING WATERS,
    And hewn themselves cisterns ––
    broken cisterns that can hold no water.”

    Our great need is to come to Christ and drink!

    John 7:37  On the last day of the feast, the great day, Jesus stood up and cried out, “If anyone thirsts, let him COME TO ME AND DRINK. 38  Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, ‘Out of his heart will flow rivers of living water.’” 39  Now this he said about the Spirit, whom those who believed in him were to receive, for as yet the Spirit had not been given, because Jesus was not yet glorified.

    The devil works to distract us from this drinking! We get busy, busy, busy, doing, doing, doing – doing any and every thing else BUT drinking!

    Belief = Coming = Drinking

    Psalm 87:7 ALL my springs are in YOU.


    Isaiah 48:1-2 Hear this, O house of Jacob, Who are called by the name of israel, And have come forth from the WELLSPRINGS OF JUDAH…

    If you’ve been reading over at naphtali_deer (especially my posts tagged hunger and thirst and experiential Christianity), you’ll know this is a passion of mine. It is a passion of mine because I wandered around as a pilgrim for years and I wasn’t drinking! I had no understanding of the life of God in the soul of man, no understanding of the need to drink the Living Water. Yes, I was saved. Yes, I knew about the Holy Spirit, but I didn’t understand my desperate plight. I didn’t understand the vital need of the Holy Spirit. I didn’t understand that apart from drinking that Living Water, I could do nothing. I didn’t see myself as poor and needy. I didn’t see myself as a wretch. Oh, yes, I was doing things, I wasn’t that bad a person, but most all of that was in my own strength and my own flesh and not in the Spirit.

    And then a few years ago, God brought me to the end of myself, caused me to face my total depravity, to fail and fall flat on my face and fail (and He’s continued to do it again and again!). Thank God for His merciful kindness that leads us into those dark and dry and desert places, into that Valley of Humiliation, because those are the places we finally come to our senses and cry out to Him, “I thirst! I thirst! There is no other I desire but You! Pour down upon me I am thirsty! There is no Living Water to be found anywhere in the world, but only in You, O Lord! You are my portion!” Those are the times we begin to know the life of God in our souls!

    Job 5:17 (KJV) Behold, happy is the man whom God correcteth: therefore despise not thou the chastening of the Almighty!

    Much of what is called Christianity today has very little to do with the souls of men.

    THE IMPORTANCE OF THE SOUL  (I did a quick look through Scripture – not an all-inclusive list by any means)

    Ezekiel 18: The soul who sins shall die.
    Psalm 116 Our souls have been saved from death by faith in Christ
    I Peter 1:18-19 our souls redeemed w/ the precious blood of Christ
    I Peter 1:9, 2:7 We should be seeking/looking to the salvation of our souls
    I Peter 2:25 Christ is the Shepherd and Overseer of our souls, should we not be concerned about the state of our own souls as well as the souls of others?
    Psalm 103, Isaiah 43 Our souls are created to bless/glorify the Lord

    THE SOUL’S JOURNEY

    Psalm 84 – As Christians we are on pilgrimage in the fallen world – the Valley of Baca – the weeping, thirsty valley – there’s weeping and thirst because of the fall, because of sin coming into the world. Where do we find water/life/joy/sustenance/strength for the journey?

    Are we longing, fainting, crying out for the living God?
    Are we seeking to find our strength in Him?
    Are our hearts set on pilgrimage?
    Are we going from strength to strength? (Without Him we can do nothing)
    Do we drink of Him so we might have joy and comfort and strength for our own souls and be able to impart those gifts to others?

    Psalm 4 – The world is looking for water… Who will show us anything good? All the world’s supplies are eventually going to come up empty. The gladness in our hearts will be more than their corn and wine, and will serve as a testimony. As we drink of the Living Water, we will show Christ’s sufficiency to quench thirst and satisfy, and we will have supplies to give out the thirsty and weeping world.

    Jeremiah 50:4  “In those days and in that time, declares the LORD, the people of Israel and the people of Judah shall come together, weeping as they come, and they shall SEEK THE LORD THEIR GOD. 5  They shall ask the way to Zion, with faces turned toward it, saying, ‘Come, let us join ourselves to the LORD in an everlasting covenant that will never be forgotten.’  (see Samuel Rutherford’s “The Deliverance of the Kirk of God” - a similar movement of home meetings had been occurring in the 17th century).


    THE SOUL’S SUSTENANCE

    1. Each one coming INDIVIDUALLY Christ to eat and drink of Him – to gain strength and to go from strength to strength (e.g.- John 4-6, Psalm 27, 63, Psalms 42-43, Psalm 1), otherwise we WILL wither.

    2. Coming together in FELLOWSHIP in the Body of Christ to encourage and exhort one another w/ the Word of God – so we might go from strength to strength

    Hebrews 10:23-25 hold fast the confession of OUR faith w/ out wavering, let US consider one another in order to stir up love & good works, not forsaking the ASSEMBLING of OURSELVES together, exhorting ONE ANOTHER, so much as we see the Day approaching.

    Romans 15:14 full of goodness, filled w/ all knowledge, able to admonish ONE ANOTHER

    Colossians 3:16 let the Word of God dwell in you richly, teaching, admonishing, singing…

    Ephesians 5:15-21 Be filled w/ the Spirit, SPEAK to ONE ANOTHER… It is FOOLISH if we do not. We are WISE when we do use our time in this way.

    Hebrews 3:12-15 Exhort ONE ANOTHER daily so we will not be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.

    Hebrews 12:12-17 strengthen, make straight, look diligently

    Philemon 1:7, 20 MUTUAL REFRESHMENT

    3. Reviewing CHRISTIAN HISTORY

    Hebrews 11-12:1-2 Look to the cloud of witnesses (past and present). In the Bible itself as well as throughout Church history. I talked for some time about my love of Christian biography and the impact it’s had on me. (See my tags Church history and biography here on deerlife and bio and Church history on my other site.)

    I Corinthians 10, Romans 15:4 These things are written for our example & learning – so we would not be ignorant, not forget God and become idolaters, tempt Christ and fall.

    THE SOUL’S BATTLES (again, not an all-inclusive list)

    Luke 21 must endure to possess our souls
    Hebrews 11:16 to look to the heavenly country, not to settle for the lesser earthly country
    temptation to gain the world and lose our souls
    I Peter 2:11 fleshly lusts war against the soul
    Hebrews 12:1-3 lay aside sin, run w/ endurance, we can become weary and discouraged in our souls as we battle sin.
    Psalm 23 our souls must be restored
    Psalm 119:36, 141 Keep Christ as our refuge, not to be ensnared or trapped for false refuge
    Psalm 116 the soul needs rest
    I John 5 keep from idols
    Hebrews 12:15 not being diligent, fall short of the grace of God, selling our birthright like Esau

    As we meet together, my hope and prayer is that as we each individually drink deeper of Christ, we can come together and strengthen and refresh one another, so we might keep drinking and persevere with joy on our pilgrimage, even as we go through the Valley of Baca and the night of doubt and sorrow…

    Through the Night of Doubt and Sorrow
    Bernhardt S. Ingemann tr. Sabine Baring-Gould

    Through the night of doubt and sorrow,
    onward goes the pilgrim band,
    singing songs of expectation,
    marching to the promised land.
    Clear before us through the darkness
    gleams and burns the guiding light:
    trusting God we march together
    stepping fearless through the night.

    One the light of God’s own presence,
    o’er his ransomed people shed,
    chasing far the gloom and terror,
    brightening all the path we tread:
    one the object of our journey,
    one the faith which never tires,
    one the earnest looking forward,
    one the hope our God inspires.

    One the strain the lips of thousands
    lift as from the heart of one;
    one the conflict, one the peril,
    one the march in God begun:
    one the gladness of rejoicing
    on the far eternal shore,
    where the one almighty Father
    reigns in love for evermore.

    Onward, therefore, pilgrim brothers,
    onward with the cross our aid;
    bear its shame, and fight its battle,
    till we rest beneath its shade.
    Soon shall come the great awaking,
    soon the rending of the tomb;
    then the scattering of all shadows,
    and the end of toil and gloom.

    * * *

    I unfolded much of that before the elders, who were very enthusiastic and encouraging. And then they helped to hone it down (a much needed thing, given the multitude of thoughts swirling in my brain at any moment in time and my difficulty with being succinct/focused), so each week we meet should will look something like this:

    1. A MAIN SCRIPTURE PASSAGE with a clear objective/aim that can be summarized in a single sentence. (Yes, yes – back to homiletics!)
    2. A HYMN to complement the passage.
    3. A BIOGRAPHICAL EXAMPLE as illustration.
    4. A time of PRAYER.

    My deepest hope and prayer is that as we fellowship and meet together, God will knit our hearts closer to Him and to one another, so we might be able to tell what God has done for each of our souls from week to week (Psalms 66:16: Come and hear, all you who fear God, and I will tell what he has done for my soul), so we might encourage and exhort each other, so we might go from strength to strength on our pilgrimage to Mount Zion, to the Celestial City (Psalm 84/Bunyan’s “Pilgrim’s Progress”)

    For those who are led to pray, I would appreciate your prayers for:

    focused time to study and pray and prepare
    clear leading as to the Scripture passages to study
    greater love for the women
    humility and reliance on the Holy Spirit
    hungry and thirsty women
    scheduling the day and time to meet

    I do believe we’ll eventually get to the book of John (which is what I initially felt led to do), but for now, it has come to seem good to start with an overview of the soul’s pilgrimage and God’s means of sustenance as we travel through the Valley of Baca (the Word of God, prayer and fellowship with believers – including the great cloud of witnesses).

    Needless to say, I am very excited about this, because this is what I absolutely love. Throughout this whole process I have been profoundly humbled. First, because of the journey of chastening God has had me on over the past few years. And second, because it is a high privilege and responsibility to give out the words of life. And that sense of humility is a very good and very necessary thing because I know I too easily become full of myself – and whenever I am full of myself I cannot be full of Christ’s Holy Spirit!

    I am praying each of you will be obedient to God’s call to you to serve Him in your local churches for the building up of the Body of Christ for His glory and for your joy.

    Thank you for your fellowship and prayers.

    Psalm 115:1  Not to us, O LORD, not to us, but to your name give glory,
    for the sake of your steadfast love and your faithfulness!

    Yours in Christ,
    Karen

    Related: Where do you go when the world is unlovely? (Psalm 84 & the theology of Biblical counseling)

  • His sweetness in the great fish | update 3/16/2011

     
    Previously I’d written that I felt like Jonah, put into a time of waiting over the past several months.

    On and off over the past several years, not just the last several months, I’ve felt like I’ve been in a great fish . . . much of that time was God’s loving discipline to me because of my own sinfulness and impetuousness, impatience, my stubbornness and unwillingness to trust and yield to Him in our last church.

    Jonah 2:3  For you cast me into the deep,
    into the heart of the seas,
    and the flood surrounded me;
    all your waves and your billows
    passed over me…



    10  And the LORD spoke to the fish, and it vomited Jonah out upon the dry land.


    And now, in God’s ordained way and time, like Jonah, I too am now being vomited out of the fish . . .

    I really do want to give you more of an update what God has been doing, but I have to say it really pales in comparison to His continuing persevering lovingkindness and mercies that followed me ALL the days of life, including all those days when I doubted and despaired, even those days when I questioned and shook my fist and my head at His workings.

    Psalm 23:6  (paraphrased)
    SURELY
    goodness and mercy
    HAS FOLLOWED me
    ALL the days of my life,
    EVERY MOMENT
    in the deep,
    in the seas,
    in the flood,
    in the waves,
    in the billows,
    EVERY MOMENT
    in the belly of the great fish…
    where even there
    EVERY MOMENT
    I dwelt in the house of the LORD,
    for all who are His dwell in His house forever!

    For where could I have gone that He did not go with me?
    (See Psalm 139:7-12)

    Isaiah 52:12b
    for the LORD will go before you,
    and the God of Israel will be your rear guard.

    I keep finding my heart drawn out in love to God in the past couple days for all He has done in light of the wilderness journey He has had me on for several years. “Drawn out” is the only phrase I have for it. I can’t express it. I never used that word before in regard to my experiential understanding of the love of God for me in Jesus Christ.

    My hopes and dreams were broken and shattered.
    I was broken and shattered.
    I felt put to shame on many occasions.

    And yet . . .

    Isaiah 49:23 those who wait for me shall not be put to shame…

    Job 5:18  For he wounds, but he binds up;
    he shatters, but his hands heal.

    Those moments
    in the deep,
    in the seas,
    in the flood,
    in the waves,
    in the billows
    in the belly of the great fish…

    No, *I* would not have chosen them,
    but in His loving wisdom to me,
    my loving heavenly Father chose them for me
    because I am His chosen child
    and He loves me.

    Hebrews 12:6
    For the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
    and chastises every son whom he receives.

    We cannot say we really know the love of God if we do not know and accept His discipline.
    (Every son – every one He loves – no exceptions!)

    Job 5:17  Behold, blessed is the one whom God reproves;
    therefore despise not the discipline of the Almighty.
    18  For he wounds, but he binds up;
    he shatters, but his hands heal.

    We cannot say we know the blessing of God if we do not know the reproof of God.
    We cannot say we know the binding and healing of God if we do not know the wounding and shattering of God.

    Because of His discipline toward me, I count Him as more precious.

    God’s refining work in His servants is as important as our work done as His servants.
    (I will even say it is even more important.)

    For how many words I usually have, how can I express or speak of His inexpressible, unspeakable Gift!

    God cast me into the deep . . . so I might begin to know the deep things of God!

    God cast me into the heart of the seas . . . so I might begin to know the heart of His love for me in the midst of His discipline!

    God cast me into the flood . . . so I might begin to cry out for Him to pour floods of His Spirit into my thirsty soul!

    God cast me into the waves . . . so I might begin to know His waves of mercy in light of my exceeding sinfulness of sin!

    God cast me into the billows . . . so I might begin to billow forth with songs of thanksgiving and praise to Him!

    Thank God for His persevering grace to His children, to Jonahs like me!

    I am overwhelmed at God’s continuing goodnesses to me in light of my continuing stubbornness and unbelief, and so I acknowledge here that IN ALL OF THAT TIME IN THE FISH, FOR EVERY MOMENT IN THE FISH WAS FOR MY GOOD AND HIS GLORY!

    Psalm 119
    65  You have dealt well with your servant,
    O LORD, according to your word.
    66  Teach me good judgment and knowledge,
    for I believe in your commandments.
    67  Before I was afflicted I went astray,
    but now I keep your word.
    68  You are good and do good;
    teach me your statutes.
    69  The insolent smear me with lies,
    but with my whole heart I keep your precepts;
    70  their heart is unfeeling like fat,
    but I delight in your law.
    71  It is good for me that I was afflicted,
    that I might learn your statutes.
    72  The law of your mouth is better to me
    than thousands of gold and silver pieces.

    In my Bible next to Hebrews 11:6, “He is a rewarder to those who diligently seek Him,” a few years back I had written:

    “The rewards are bittersweet.”

    This morning I woke up thinking of the time I’d written that, but then I was rebuked and all but shouted out, “No, no! The rewards are NOT bittersweet – the rewards are sweet! Wholly sweet!” As the Psalmist said, God is good and does good! When is there a time that God is not good? When is there a time that God does not do good? Oh, yes, it seemed bittersweet to me at times (it is true that the discipline of the Lord often seems grievous and painful to us, rather than pleasant), and I confess there are times it even in retrospect it still does seem to be, but know this: our God can give His children NOTHING BUT SWEETNESS. Nothing but sweetness! For Jesus Christ IS nothing but sweetness to us! Hallelujah!

    Song of Solomon 2
    3  As an apple tree among the trees of the forest,
    so is my beloved among the young men.
    With great delight I sat in his shadow,
    and his fruit was sweet to my taste,
    4  He brought me to the banqueting house,
    and his banner over me was love.

    Was there a day, or even a moment, when His banner over me was not love? No, there was not!
    That banner of love includes our Father’s discipline.

    I confess there were times I did not sit with great delight in that chastening time in the great fish! I hope and pray that as I am disciplined in the future (for I certainly will be!), that by God’s grace I will be able to sit with great delight there and be able to taste that His fruit is sweet to me even there and be assured that His banner over me continues to be love – from henceforth and forevermore! He has loved His children with an everlasting love! We were loved in Christ Jesus before time began! God’s discipline is not separating us FROM His love, it is drawing us INTO a greater experiential understanding of His love – to eat of His sweet fruit! Hallelujah! I hope and pray all of you who are Christ’s are enabled to come into a greater understanding of God’s love for you through His discipline toward you.

    Job 5:17  Behold, blessed is the one whom God reproves;
    therefore despise not the discipline of the Almighty.

    Hebrews 12:5 “My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord,
    nor be weary when reproved by him.
    6  For the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
    and chastises every son whom he receives.”

  • And the LORD appointed a great fish | Update 2/23/2011

     

    Jonah 1:17  And the LORD appointed a great fish to swallow up Jonah. And Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights.

    I feel I’ve been in a great fish for a few months now.

    To explain . . .

    I’ve written previously (first mentioned at the end of this post and my last update), it seemed a door was opening at our local church last fall regarding women’s ministry, but things haven’t progressed quite as I expected: it hasn’t opened in the time and the way I’d been expecting. . . . A humbling reminder that God is God and I am NOT….

    And so, you may ask, why the reference to Jonah?

    First off, our pastor has been preaching on Jonah, and as he preached on this verse recently it was a stark reminder to me that I’ve been in a waiting time like Jonah.

    Jonah ended up in the great fish because he flat-out disregarded and disobeyed God’s clear command to rise and go to Nineveh. Jonah hightailed it in completely the opposite direction to God’s will – on a ship to Tarshish.

    On the other hand, I’ve ended up in this great fish, well, I’m not quite sure why, though I do believe I have been and am still headed in the way of God’s will. No, of course, I’m not saying I’ve done everything perfectly…

    But God brings great fish to swallow His people for His purposes. Great fish never swallow us by accident. They are always appointed by the LORD.

    So right now I am trying to appreciate the loving hand of my Father’s discipline in bringing me here, and His sovereignty in this time of waiting in the great fish.

    God has a reason for this delay, and I don’t pretend to know His plans in all this. He alone knows the end from the beginning.

    What I do know . . .

    I do know there have been times that I’ve been tempted to move forward and to try to push myself out of the fish’s belly, but His grace has restrained me. Thank God!

    I also know there have been times when I’ve been tempted to doubt God’s calling and second-guess things. This has to do with being haunted by my demons of my past sin, past failures, impulsivity and impetuousness, looking back and seeing how things turned out wretchedly in the past, and as a result I’ve been tempted to be paralyzed and shrink back in unbelief and doubt and uncertainty and confusion.

    Having learned a little from my past experiences of chastening, I do know that moving ahead of God’s timing, trying to push myself out of that fish’s belly a minute too soon is NEVER a good thing. Too often in the past I have acted out of my own flesh and my own impulsivity, rather than out of His Spirit and His love compelling me. But I also do need to do follow through in obedience to what He is calling me to do, including my time while I am in this fish – in this time of waiting. I can see how some of my past failures have led to some overcompensation now, i.e. – some hesitancy and doubt rising from my flesh, rather than my moving forward in faith as I ought to be doing. I need wisdom to know what is of my flesh and of His Spirit, and would appreciate your prayers for discernment for me in this.

    Job 5:17 has been in my thoughts for several days now. Here’s the KJV:

    Behold, happy is the man whom God correcteth: therefore despise not thou the chastening of the Almighty…

    I want to be happy in this fish. I want to be happy in this waiting.

    Behold, happy!

    Yes, that’s HAPPY. This is really an Old Testament beatitude – for the word “happy” can also be translated “blessed.”

    Behold, happy is the man whom God correcteth: therefore despise not thou the chastening of the Almighty…

    How can this be? How can we be happy when corrected?

    Well, basically, if we are the children of God, we should be able to be happy no matter where we are – and not despise it – and that includes every day we sit in the great fish’s belly – every time we are corrected or chastened or being trained in some way – because we have full assurance our God is our loving Father and He is with us there – and in fact, He has superintended all the circumstances that led to us being there (yes, even our sinfulness and stupidity) and all of it is purposed by Him to work for our good and profit and refining and fruitfulness (see Hebrews 12) and that all our trials are ordained only if necessary (I Peter 1).

    I do not want to despise this ordained chastening time in this fish. I want to be happy here in the waiting.

    I confess I’d become frustrated and grumbling and distressed and hopeless and impatient and doubting and not happy and not joyful here in the belly of this fish, and I knew it. (See my post here.) And I could see that that attitude made me feel even less happy and less joyful, for I knew I had no good excuse to act that way. So I knew I had to once again entrust myself once more to my Father in heaven. He helped me to begin to ask Him for faith and patience and to trust that His loving hand has put me here and He will not leave me here any longer than is necessary.

    Now, regarding what I should be doing while I am still in this fish. . .

    One thing I’ve been wanting to do for a little while now, and one thing I know I should be doing, is to write out a short description of the vision of the type of group I would like to see at our church (you’ll get a little flavor of that here).

    In short, I am seeking others who are concerned about their souls. Psalm 66 is one passage that keeps coming to my mind, particularly verse 16:

    16  Come and hear, all you who fear God,
    and I will tell what he has done for my soul.

    I am seeking people who want to speak with others about what God has done for their souls. God’s first concern is our souls, and this must be our first concern as well.

    There is no true and living and life-giving Christianity if the soul is left out of the picture. Too much of what masquerades as Christianity today is about any and all things but the soul.

    Henry Scougal (1650-1678) called Christianity “the life of God in the soul of man.” We’ve lost that sense too many places. It took me about twenty-five years of being a Christian to begin to understand that. I say begin . . . for I don’t really understand it much – but if we don’t see Christianity as a life, if we don’t see Christianity as a religion of the soul, then we are greatly misguided and being deceived and missing out on the life that Jesus Christ wants to impart to all who believe through His Holy Spirit.

    I’m hoping to post more of my thoughts on this, but I’ve not been able to concentrate well enough to get them down in writing, though I have places I’ve scribbled down some things and I have been pondering them in my head for a while now, which leads to a prayer request. I would appreciate prayer so I might have focus to write some of these things down, so I can communicate more effectively the passion and vision God has been putting on my heart with the leadership and others at our church. And please pray that I would be happy as I am corrected by the Lord and not despise His chastening.

    I thank God for each of you. Please let me know how I can be praying for you (either in a comment below and/or by private message) – particularly how I might pray for you in your calling to your local church.

    May God’s Spirit stir up in His people a relentless passion for the name and renown of Jesus Christ.

    Yours in Christ for His glory in the Church,
    Karen