In his Journals, George Whitefield wrote of a group called “The New Lights,” who were set up for worship and fellowship in Gibraltar (131).

Sunday, Feb. 25 [1738]. About six this morning went with friend Habersham to the church to pray with some devout soldiers, who I heard used to meet there at that time, and with whom my soul was knit immediately. After we had finished our devotion, I made an enquiry into their state, and found that their Society had been subsisting about twelve years, and that one Sergeant B., (a devout soldier indeed) now amongst them, was the first beginner of it. At first, they told me they used to meet in dens and mountains, and caves int he rocks; but afterwards, upon their applying for leave to build a little place to retire in, Doctor C., and Governor Sabine gave them the free use of the Church, where they constantly meet three times in a day to pray, read, and sing psalms, and at any other season when they pleased. They have met with contempt, and are now, in derision, called The New Lights. A glorious light they are indeed; for I conversed closely with several of them, and they made me quite ashamed of my little proficiency in the School of Christ. Many have joined with them for a time, but a servile fear of men – that bane of Christianity – made them draw back. However, some continue steadfast and immoveable, though despised by the world. Governor Sabine countenances them much, and has spoken of them often to me with respect. Blessed be God! even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, Who hath not left Himself without witness in any place, but hath some everywhere, who serve Him and work righteousness.

The Sunday before we came hither, I was telling my friend Habersham that I had reason to think by what had happened to me, that God had some work for me to do at Gibraltar. He answered that there could not be much good expected from among soldiers. I replied – No Doubt God has some secret ones in all places, who tremble at His Word. And lo! He hath this day brought me to them.

Iain Murray (in “Revival and Revivalism: The Making and Marring of American Evangelicalism 1750-1858,” Banner of Truth Trust (Edinburgh: 1994, reprinted 1996, 57)) wrote this:

George Whitefield also wrote that he “had a sweet knot of religious friends” (Journals, 91).

All of us who are here together are sure testimony to how God has some secret ones in all places, who tremble at His Word – even here at Xanga and Revelife! Certainly something good came out of Nazareth…and something good can even come out of Xanga and Revelife too. (Please see here and here.)

When I began blogging, as I’ve said before, revival wasn’t even on my radar screen. Yes, I knew there were things not right with the church, and that greatly distressed me. I was thinking of and reading about and researching ways we/I could fix the Church, but in the meantime, God made it clear the only way the Church can be reformed is through a sovereign movement of His Holy Spirit. (The first step in that process was for Him to humble me and to show me that I couldn’t fix myself, much less the Church! How ridiculous we are to have such thoughts!)

I’ve been so blessed as I’ve come across people both here and locally whom God has been touching and reviving with His Spirit, to show them their insufficiency and His sufficiency, helping them to delight in Him and His Gospel and giving them eyes to see the sad state of the Church and burdening them to pray for revival as well as to encourage and build up one another in the faith.

I will say that God has indeed brought a few of us together here as “The New Lights,” as a little “cluster,” as “a sweet knot of religious friends.”

I’ve not met any of you. Yet, you are a sweet knot of religious friends to me. You are lights here that have served to bring brightness to some of my dark days. Just to know there are others out there who are like-minded has been such an encouragement to me. That God has other people in “this city,” so to speak. When we may be tempted to feel we are alone like Elijah, yet we can know God does have many of His people throughout the world who hunger and thirst for Him. (Yes, I know I wrote yesterday about the danger and temptation to make more of our friends than we ought. Yet, God does give us Christian friends to encourage us, for sure; we must always keep all things in the right perspective, however.)

Yes, we’re small in number, but we know numbers never limit God (e.g.- see here).

Yes, we’re limited by distance (computer screens just aren’t quite the same as in-person contact) and we have no formal structure, both of which I’ve found a bit frustrating. Yet I will say God has knit our souls together in Him in a way I’d not imagined. We have a common love for the Lord and His Church given to us by His Spirit.

As I said when I started up deerlife, my intent here is to encourage us to encourage one another as we blog/comment here, but also to go out into our local communities and churches and work there. I truly value the friendships and fellowship I have found here. I have been truly blessed. More than I could have imagined. I am not ready to discard what we have here, nor do I believe God intends for us to discard it at this time. I also believe there are others God wants to draw into this cluster here along with us. (I would appreciate your continuing to pray that God would draw those He wills to come alongside us, those who have a desire to see God glorified and magnified in His Church.)

From the time I started up tent of meeting, I’ve had in the back of my mind to challenge those of you out there to begin praying that God might bring you to like-minded men and women in your own churches and cities and begin to meet with them on a regular basis to pray for revival for we know that God does have some secret ones in all places, who tremble at His Word. (I’ve already been doing this for myself to some extent.) I’ve held off on publicly announcing that since I didn’t want to go ahead of God, but I believe I He’s leading me to give you that challenge today. I do know He is calling me to more concerted prayer for myself in that regard.

I have no authority over any of you, but I will humbly ask you to consider praying about this, to pray that God would lead you to others in your own area who are zealous for God’s Name and are longing for revival in the Church and seeking to pray for revival. In due time, I also expect to make this type of request on tent of meeting as well (and possibly my other blog, napthali_deer), but for now I am bringing this request to this cluster of friends here, and I am asking as God leads you, that you would begin praying this not only for yourself but also for the rest of us here.

I have a dream of many sweet knots of religious friends, clusters of friends flourishing all over the globe as they gather together in concerted prayer to seek God’s face for revival! No Doubt God has some secret ones in all places, who tremble at His Word. The thought of this thrills me! I hope it does you also.

I’m also bringing this request to you now in part because just last month I became a member of our local church (after having been there over two years) and tonight for the first time I will be attending a women’s gathering with some other women from our church. Yes, it’s taken me a while, but now God has made it clear to us this is the place we are to be, so now I am stepping out in faith. I have already been praying God would give me His eyes to see those He has given a heart to see the Church revived. I have also been praying about and for several other friends in the area whom I know in other churches. I have seen God working in some women (and men) here in much the same way He has in me (and as I’ve seen in you): giving us a hunger for Him which goes beyond a mere head knowledge to an intimate, experiential knowledge of Him; a greater desire to worship Him and enjoy Him; an increasing desire for holiness and an increasing hatred of sin; and so on.

I don’t know what God has ahead for any of us, but I want to thank God and thank you all for your fellowship here and your many encouragements to me.

May God Almighty strengthen us to keep prostrating ourselves before Him on behalf of His Church, for we are His people and His inheritance whom He brought out with His mighty power and outstretched arm! (Deuteronomy 9)

I Samuel 12:19  And all the people said to Samuel, “Pray for your servants to the LORD your God, that we may not die, for we have added to all our sins this evil, to ask for ourselves a king.” 20  And Samuel said to the people, “Do not be afraid; you have done all this evil. Yet do not turn aside from following the LORD, but serve the LORD with all your heart. 21  And do not turn aside after empty things that cannot profit or deliver, for they are empty. 22  For the LORD will not forsake his people, for his great name’s sake, because it has pleased the LORD to make you a people for himself. 23  Moreover, as for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the LORD by ceasing to pray for you, and I will instruct you in the good and the right way.

May we seek to glorify God and enjoy Him forever!

Captured by His love, mercy and grace,
Karen

Most of us are familiar with the events of Numbers 20 at Kadesh. The Israelites were whining and murmuring (once again) because there was no water.

We can see here that Moses started out well…He and Aaron headed straight to the tent of meeting and fell on their faces before the LORD in prayer. The glory of the LORD appeared. The LORD gave them clear directions. But then what happened?

Hmm…Moses didn’t finish so well there, did he?

I can see myself in that. I start off well and for various reasons don’t always end up finishing well. My flesh takes over…

I also know I’ve had times I’ve been tempted at times to hit the rock, when I was only to speak to it.
I must say I have spoken to the rock when I’ve only been supposed to speak to it.
I lost patience and did not trust God to work in His way and in His time.
I reaped what I’ve sown.

I know I’ve been tempted in recent days to hit the rock, when I’m only supposed to speak to it.
I know how easy it would be to hit the rock. Too easy.
I’ve been close to hitting it…very close…too close.
I’m in danger of losing patience and not trusting God to work in His way and in His time.
LORD God, guard my mouth, hold my hand back. Help me to trust You to work in Your way and Your time.
Help me to be obedient to Your commandments.

(That’s not my main emphasis today here, yet these are things I’ve been struggling with once again, so I’m including them here…)

We know the rest of Moses’ story. Because Moses struck the rock twice instead of speaking to it, God spoke these words to Moses:

Any time we don’t do things in God’s prescribed way, the LORD is not hallowed and there will be consequences for that…Yes, God is gracious to us, and He uses all things (even our sins) for our good and His glory, yet it is true that we will reap what we sow, and, as a result, there may very well be dire consequences (e.g.- consider David’s sin with Bathsheba and the ensuing cover-up).

If we stopped right there and focused on the fact that Moses wasn’t able to lead Israel into the promised land, not even to put a foot there, this would be a very depressing story…(Yes, I know Moses ended up there at the Transfiguration…)

I know if I were Moses I would be tempted to say, “Ok, LORD, that’s enough. If I can’t get into the promised land, why bother?” (self-centered much?)

I will confess to you that my promised land is revival coming to the Church. And I can too easily make that an idol.

If I knew I would never see revival come in my lifetime, I know I would be tempted to say, “Ok, LORD, that’s enough. If I’m not going to see revival, why bother? Why bother if I won’t get to cross over Jordan?”

(Yes, I know Moses did pray to the Lord about his not being able to go into the promised land in Deut. 3, see more below.)

However, that’s not the attitude we see in Moses after Kadesh. After his disobedience in hitting the rock, in spite of the LORD’s clear proclamation that Moses would not be going into the promised land, we find Moses picking up in obedience to the LORD’s commands.

Here are a few instances. (You can go and read the surrounding context of each.)

(I’d just like to note that this pattern of obedience is only a continuation of Moses’ previous obedience to the LORD prior to hitting the rock at Kadesh. From the day at the burning bush (yes, granted, there were some questions then, I know…), to speaking to Aaron, to the encounters with Pharaoh, to the preparations for the Passover, to the Exodus from Egypt, to the Red Sea, to Marah, to Massah and Meribah, to Mt. Sinai, to the golden calf, to the tabernacle preparations, to the priestly garments, to disciplining the rebellious…which really hit close to home, his own sister Miriam, brother Aaron and nephews Nadab and Abihu, and so on…)

As we look at those verses above, we can see that Moses’ obedience doesn’t just involve Moses, but also involves other people and very often the whole nation of Israel. What would have happened if Moses just decided to chuck it?

Though our obedience always has implications, let’s consider what would have happened to those countless other souls if Moses hadn’t obeyed as God commanded. We certainly must be humbled and sobered when we consider the wide-reaching and long-term implications of our disobedience (and obedience).

Among God’s commands after Moses’ disobedience at Kadesh, there are a couple I find really challenging.

First is the command of the Lord to Moses to strip his deceased brother Aaron of his garments and put them on Aaron’s son Eleazar. Miriam had died not long before the incident at Kadesh and now Aaron dies. How devastating would that be?

Yet what was Moses’ response?

Second is the command to Moses to commission his successor, Joshua:

Moses’ response?

Moses did as the LORD commanded.

Um, yeah, I admit I’d have a tough time with that one. Well, I don’t think it wouldn’t be that bad if I knew I was going to enter into the promised land…But Moses wasn’t going, the LORD had made that clear – yet we see no hint of resentment or jealousy in Moses.

The LORD said it and Moses did it.

Will I? Will it be said of me:

I confess I still don’t have that kind of heart, or the heart of John the Baptist (well, really the heart of Jesus…Philippians 2…):

But am I, a servant of the LORD, to dictate to the LORD the terms of my service to Him?

I am praying God might circumcise my heart to do as He commands. May He give me sufficient grace when He places me in such situations. I am praying His Spirit might work in me so I might not be jealous but rather joyful, that I might be rejoicing rather than resenting…and I might willingly submit myself to serve the LORD however and wherever the He commands. I am praying my joy might be complete as I see others increase as I decrease.

As I was in my car today, I drove near the workplace of a friend who works because she has to; she would relish to be in my position. I don’t have to work outside the home; my husband has been so gracious and generous to me, and our God has been so gracious and generous to us in providing for all our needs and far beyond that. So as I considered that, God hit me with His divine 2 x 4, and I began to come to my senses and cry out (once again):

So what else would I rather be doing with my time than studying and teaching and blogging the Word of God and praying for revival?
What else is more wonderful?
Who else is more wonderful than You, Lord?
Don’t let me squander this opportunity You’ve given me!
Don’t let me waste my life!
Help me to finish well like Moses did!

These things have been weighing on my mind because of an account I recently read of Martyn Lloyd-Jones’ (ML-J) last days. This is in part what led to write the following in my last update:

I also have some things I’ve been contemplating about ministry which at first I found daunting, but God has allowed me to settle in and trust Him in those and ponder them in my heart for the time being and trust Him to show me what I need to know when I need to know it and to know that He never gives us more than He equips us to do.

Here’s Iain Murray writing of a conversation he had with ML-J less than a month before his death (“The Fight of Faith,” 773):

I scarcely ever recall ML-J drawing any parallel between his own ministry and that of any Christian figure of a past age. But one parallel which he did draw in conversation on February 5, 1981 is a striking illustration of what was uppermost in his heart. ‘I feel in many way,’ he said, ‘like Griffith Jones of  Llanddowror.’ The man to whom he hoped to possess a resemblance was a little-remembered figure, born in Carmarthenshire in 1683 and significant not so much for what he achieved as for what he did in preparing the way for others. Griffith Jones was ‘the morning star’ of the great awakening of the eighteenth century in Wales, the forerunner of the better-known men who were to follow. The comparison tells us a great deal. Dr Lloyd-Jones had yearned for something in his own day which, when he spoke these words, he knew he was not going to be permitted to see. But his mind was not on the question of how posterity would remember him, it was on the success of the gospel. I responded, ‘As you have often said, God’s calendar is not ours’, but, only half-hearing me, he went on: ‘I never thought it was going to take so long. I thought I was going to see great revival but I am not complaining. It wasn’t God’s time and this preparatory work had to be done.’ If he could die believing that he had been permitted to do something to prepare the way for better men and greater days, that was enough.

I read these words and started to weep. I’ve only had a burden for revival for just over a year and I’m already impatient…yet the Doctor had such a burden for years. As I read and listen to his sermons on revival, I sometimes cry; he’d even seen some revival in his first pastorate in Wales during the early 1930′s, but then nothing after that on any large scale, but he longed for more since he’d experienced first-hand in that congregation and in his own life. He was so burdened to see revival come to the Church because he saw the ruins. God has opened my eyes to those ruins and I am now burdened to see revival come in much the same way.

Like ML-J I am yearning for something because I’ve had a taste of it in my own life and have seen that in the lives of a few others. I don’t yet know if I’ll see wide scale revival in my lifetime. I’m over fifty now; I don’t know how many years I have left here, I don’t know when or if the Lord might choose to come down from on high with power to revive the Church. I don’t know when He might return to take us home. But I do know (and I’ve already known this deep down for a while now) that part of my ministry is a preparation ministry. When I read those words, they were hard for me to swallow because that was a reminder to me that I must have the grace to step aside and commission the Joshuas who are younger to take up the work, and I may very well not be allowed to cross over Jordan.

We see the account of Moses’ conversation with the LORD in Deuteronomy 3:23-36…Moses knew God was great and mighty, so he prayed he might be able to cross over Jordan.

26  But the LORD was angry with me because of you and would not listen to me. And the LORD said to me, ‘Enough from you; do not speak to me of this matter again. 27  Go up to the top of Pisgah and lift up your eyes westward and northward and southward and eastward, and look at it with your eyes, for you shall not go over this Jordan. 28  But charge Joshua, and encourage and strengthen him, for he shall go over at the head of this people, and he shall put them in possession of the land that you shall see.’

That’s serious stuff. The LORD was clear there.

I can’t ever demand I get to cross over Jordan, but only trust God’s goodness to me and to know He will not withhold from me anything good. If it is good for me to cross over Jordan, to see revival in my lifetime, I will see it.

My first concern must be with the glory of God and the success of the Gospel.

I will say that I know there are some Joshuas out there, and I get teary-eyed now as I think of them and mention that now. I am praying for many young people who don’t even know I’m praying for them. I don’t know what will come out of that, but as God directs me, I’m continuing to pray for them. I thank God for those young men and women, and I pray God give me the grace to minister with perseverance until my final breath, knowing full well I am doing preparatory work for the Lord to come. May God give me the grace to persevere, to plant and water the seeds God gives me, even though I may not see much of the harvest in this lifetime. Yes, I confess that I would love to see wide-spread revival, I would love to go over the Jordan into the promised land, but if that is not the Lord’s will for me, may I persevere in obedience until the very end, like Moses. So long as the LORD gives me breath may I cry out:

Isaiah 40
3  …“In the wilderness prepare the way of the LORD;
make straight in the desert a highway for our God.
4  Every valley shall be lifted up,
and every mountain and hill be made low;
the uneven ground shall become level,
and the rough places a plain.
5  And the glory of the LORD shall be revealed,
and all flesh shall see it together,
for the mouth of the LORD has spoken.”

May it be said of me:
 

Karen did as the LORD commanded.

May it be said of all of us:

We did as the LORD commanded.

If I can die believing that I have been permitted to do something to prepare the way for better men and greater days, may that be enough for me!

Dear friends in Christ,

Thank you to all of you who have been praying for me. (See my last update/prayer requests.)

I thank God that He has refreshed my soul. He has done that in numerous ways.

I had wonderful worship w/ some old friends over the weekend and then fellowship with some friends from our old church.

I’ve picked up in reading Iain Murray’s “Revival and Revivalism,” as well as rereading “George Whitefield’s Journals.” As soon as you begin to read things like that, your mind gets set once again on heavenly things and things of earth grow strangely dim. That has renewed and refueled my vision and passion to pray for revival and to continue to blog meaty stuff here.

I’ve continued to be blessed by the study of John in our BSF class. I only returned there in March and I am amazed (though shouldn’t really be) at how God is showing me so much new in those last chapters in John.

I love being outside and we have had a wonderful spring here, probably one of the earliest and nicest since I moved here in 1981. Walking and just sitting and reading/praying/contemplating/listening to music is a tonic to my soul. This is one of my favorite spots where I like to sit. It’s in a park about a mile from home. I walked there today… 

This second picture is a photo not from that same park, but from the UW-Arboretum…

I realized once again today how I must make time to worship with music daily. Though I listen to music a lot of the time, I must take time to really focus on the words and on the Lord and worship, just worship, rather than multi-task.

Finally, if you have unconfessed sin or are struggling with sin, you cannot have the joy of the Lord He intends. But once you recognize that sin and confess it and begin to do battle, the joy begins to flow. I had some sins and fears to deal with and God has helped me to come through those. (I’ve written about some of that here, here, here and here.) Once again I was dealing with my lust for public praise and needing to make war with that. I also have some things I’ve been contemplating about ministry which at first I found daunting, but God has allowed me to settle in and trust Him in those and ponder them in my heart for the time being and trust Him to show me what I need to know when I need to know it and to know that He never gives us more than He equips us to do.

I find it quite ironic that later on the same day I posted about making war on my desire for public recognition, TheologiansCafe rec’d my post Praying for Revelife (and your own blog). (I’d pulsed a link to that post earlier in the evening due to some concerns a fellow sister in Christ was having w/ Revelife; she rec’d it and TheoDan saw it and the rest is history…)

So, please, please, my friends, hit me over the head when I start to babble some sort of nonsense about recognition, etc., etc. (Or at least pray for me! Then hit me!) Recognition comes with its own headaches…I found that out again this time around, plus I thought I’d already learned my lesson last fall with the Revelife-Calvinism flap. *sigh* No different that James and John, am I?

As much as I am joking here, I do know this is an ongoing struggle for me. And I hate it. So I am trusting God will help me to glory in Him and rejoice in Him more and more and not to concern myself about the rest (Psalm 131). God is never going to bless my writing if I have mixed motives. I very much appreciate your prayers. I do know that over the past few days God has given me some sweet unexpected fruit of behind-the-scenes ministry to single souls. There is so much joy there! To see a single sheep lifted up by my words is so, so wonderful! There is way, way more joy in that than having 99 people visit one of my posts.

In addition to the requests I gave previously, tonight I’m asking you to pray for clear leading in my blogging on my naphtali_deer site. I will tell you that I have about 100 private posts there. Some of them will always stay private and some of them were already converted into public posts, but a vast majority are posts I’d begun at one time or another and put aside intending to post publicly eventually. It seems that with every day, I have ideas for at least a couple more blogs as well. Needless to say, this can be overwhelming at times. I really need ears to hear God’s voice so I might know what to post about on a particular day. I don’t want to be driven by the calendar or what I’m reading in Xanga/Revelife community or what’s happening there, and yet there are times I should be writing to do so.

Here are a few things I would like to write about and/or are in the queue:

Anyhow, there’s some of the list. I’m putting them down here, so I might actually remember…

Perhaps there’s something else God might have for me. I’m trusting He would show me that.

There are also some things I’d like to post here re: my vision for this site. I hope to do that soon, D.V.

If you have prayer requests you would like to share publicly here, please feel free to do so; otherwise, you can message them to me. My prayer is that we might encourage one another by our words here as well as uphold each other in prayer. Thank you for your friendship and fellowship in Christ.

Yours in Christ,
Karen