Not long after I started up deerlife, I wrote (boldface added today):

I have been praying for some time God would bring together in a more cohesive way those of us who have a heart for revival and have  received a calling to pray for revival. I believe we are spread too thinly on the wall (think Nehemiah).

Nehemiah 4:19 And I said to the nobles and to the officials and to the rest of the people, “The work is great and widely spread, and we are separated on the wall, far from one another. 20 In the place where you hear the sound of the trumpet, rally to us there. Our God will fight for us.”

I'm not quite sure how this might look in reality, but I have been feeling for some time that we need to be strategic as we rebuild the wall. By strategic I don't mean resorting to worldly means but seeking God's ways and God's wisdom. The three fold cord is not quickly broken. I confess I have often been tempted to feel like Elijah, that there are no others out there (as I know others have had similar temptations), even though I know there are others. Let us remember that God always has a faithful remnant He is calling and wanting to use. Through deerlife, I pray God might raise up a fellowship of believers here who can support, uphold and encourage one another, so we can be mobilized and sent back into our home churches and communities on mission for Him. I am praying that those of us who have had a taste of revival in our own lives would be able to take that into our churches. I know there are some of us who are specifically called to this blogging community, but all of us are called to build on the home front as well.

I am also praying God would begin to raise up people in the local church to disciple and equip the saints both now and as revival does come, for there will be an influx of hungry souls needing meat. We should all be praying about our responsibility and role in that.

I love the Church and want to see her glorify God as she is intended and that starts with each one of us! I am a strong advocate of every member ministry. As Christians, we are all ministers, we are all uniquely called and equipped by God to be serving Him, His people and our neighbor in love with the gifts and resources He provides for His glory. I am praying God would be gracious to us and allow us to encourage one another to live our lives to His glory in the places He has put us here on this earth.

In the Church today the work is great and the work is widely spread. It is also crucial for us to come together because the world is united in opposition against Christ and against those who are seeking to do His will and seeking the welfare of His Church. We are separated on the wall, far from one another in many ways. I am praying God might be gracious to us here and work through Deerlife to equip, encourage and edify His people as we seek to walk in the works God has ordained for us and build up His Body for His glory.

For more information, please read my posts Welcome to deerlife and Why deerlife? (we are separated on the wall, far from one another). (Some of the thoughts I've shared here have been adapted from those posts.)

I would also invite you to visit my other websites, naphtali_deer (Reformed Bible teaching with an eye to experiential Christianity) and tent_of_meeting (prayer for revival).

By the grace of God may we battle with His strength where He leads us and may our God fight for us! May Jesus Christ and Him crucified be preached and Jesus Christ have the preeminence in His Church once more!

And just over three years ago, on May 14, 2010, in my post, a challenge to you (God has some secret ones in all places), I wrote ... (boldface added today):

As I said when I started up deerlife, my intent here is to encourage us to encourage one another as we blog/comment here, but also to go out into our local communities and churches and work there. I truly value the friendships and fellowship I have found here. I have been truly blessed. More than I could have imagined. I am not ready to discard what we have here, nor do I believe God intends for us to discard it at this time. I also believe there are others God wants to draw into this cluster here along with us.

From the time I started up [my other blog] tent of meeting [in March 2009], I've had in the back of my mind to challenge those of you out there to begin praying that God might bring you to like-minded men and women in your own churches and cities and begin to meet with them on a regular basis to pray for revival for we know that God does have some secret ones in all places, who tremble at His Word. (I've already been doing this for myself to some extent.) I've held off on publicly announcing that since I didn't want to go ahead of God, but I believe I He's leading me to give you that challenge today. I do know He is calling me to more concerted prayer for myself in that regard.

I have no authority over any of you, but I will humbly ask you to consider praying about this, to pray that God would lead you to others in your own area who are zealous for God's Name and are longing for revival in the Church and seeking to pray for revival... I am bringing this request to this cluster of friends here, and I am asking as God leads you, that you would begin praying this not only for yourself but also for the rest of us here.

I have a dream of many sweet knots of religious friends, clusters of friends flourishing all over the globe as they gather together in concerted prayer to seek God's face for revival! No Doubt God has some secret ones in all places, who tremble at His Word. The thought of this thrills me! I hope it does you also.

The thought of this still thrills me today! Little by little, God has been leading me (in spite of my fears, my pride, and my stubbornness!) into fellowship with a few of those secret ones locally here in the Madison area. I'm not going to sugar-coat this at all:  this has NOT been an easy process or a painless journey by any means, but it's been a wholly profitable one. And I confess I've struggled many a time as I've looked around at the "waves" rather than fixing my eyes on Jesus and staying my mind upon Jehovah and entrusting myself wholly to Him –– but God has continued to show Himself ever faithful and ever true, and shown His mysterious and inscrutable ways to be always loving, always wise, always good, and always beneficial to my soul...

I've shared a some of my journey in the local church through my blogging (see my posts tagged local church ). I've not been blogging as much here at deerlife (or, for that matter, on my other sites) because my mind, my heart, my energy, and my emotions have been increasingly devoted to the local church, but I still have a great affection for all the saints in all places (including those of you I've met via Xanga), as well as a desire for God's Gospel to run speedily to all the nations –- and so it is with very many mixed emotions that I write today... I'm feeling somewhat like Paul and the Ephesian elders on the seashore (Acts 20):

As I've been blogging at deerlife significantly less often than when I started up, in light of the upcoming changes at Xanga and the possibility that Xanga may even end up shutting down (if you've not heard, Xanga is hoping to convert to a paid blogging platform - please see here and here) –– I'm planning to shut down deerlife eventually (whether or not Xanga continues). I believe deerlife may possibly be grandfathered in for a period of time if Xanga gets the funding it needs since I did purchase a Life membership just over three years ago. Regardless, I'm hoping to consolidate the posts I've written here into my other two sites. I'm not quite sure how I'm going to do that, but I'll update you here in another post with the details. I'm suspecting I may end up tagging them with "deerlife import," "deerlife post," or something like that.

In my very first post here on deerlife (March 15, 2010), I wrote:

I feel I already have a lot I'm already juggling (as do many of you), but if we might come together here once in a while to support each other, I pray it might be a blessing to all so we might build up the local body of Christ in our own communities.

I have been blessed immensely through blogging here, and I thank you for reading, and I thank you for your encouragements and your prayers. However, with my focus increasingly drawn to engagement in the local church, I'm definitely juggling even more –– but as God allows, I still wish to encourage and support you, particularly to spur you on to minister in your local church and to pray for revival. However, that won't be happening here via deerlife, but, Lord willing, I hope to continue to do so through my other websites:

If you are NOT currently part of a local church, whether or not Xanga shuts down, I urge each and every one of you to go and find a local church steeped in Reformed Bible teaching. (Truly, I do love all the saints, but, well, I say unapologetically that I'm one of the saints cut out of the Reformed cloth. )

Yes, we can certainly join with other believers via cyberspace, and I have found some blessing in that for sure, but there's a limit to that.

And yes, there will be struggles and difficulties as you seek to find a local church. People are fallible and they will disappoint you (yourself and myself included!).

All that said, I beg of you:  please pray to the Lord to lead you in this, and then to submit to HIS leading and entrust yourself to HIM as you put yourself under the regular systematic teaching of the Word of God, the leadership and discipline of church elders, and the accountability of other believers –– otherwise you are going to be tossed to and fro and you will be deceived (see Eph. 4:1-16). The Church is the pillar and ground of the truth, and as much as I do appreciate the internet and the many resources and relationships that have benefited my soul, there's really a free-for-all out there as far as doctrine goes, and that's a real and grave danger. The devil appears as an angel of light –– prowling on website after website, seeking whom he will devour!

And yes, it's true that each one of us has been redeemed by the blood of Jesus and has been called out of the world as individuals –– however, we are also part of the ekklesia... (From Strong's Concordance: 1577 ekklesia ek-klay-see'-ah from a compound of 1537 and a derivative of 2564; a calling out, i.e. (concretely) a popular meeting, especially a religious congregation (Jewish synagogue, or Christian community of members on earth or saints in heaven or both):--assembly, church.) In other words, Jesus died to purchase a people for Himself, a community, i.e. - His bride, His Body. If you are not involved in the local Body of Christ, you are quenching and grieving the Holy Spirit of God.

Whether Xanga will continue is yet to be seen. At this point, with 19 days left until the deadline of July 15, they raised just over $ 31,000 of their goal of $ 60,000, Xanga 2.0 is looking less and less likely... (link)).

If you'd like to, if you've never done so, you can check out my other Xanga sites (above) and/or keep in touch with me via WordPress at the site below. If Xanga does get the funding to carry on, it sounds like there'll be a transition period around July 15, so I'll be giving updates on my WordPress blog. And if Xanga does shut down, I'm expecting to import my naphtali_deer Xanga site to my WordPress blog, and start up another WP site for my tent_of_meeting Xanga site.

http://naphtalideer.wordpress.com
feed://naphtalideer.wordpress.com/feed/   

I've been reading in Daniel, and in times of uncertainty, change, and transition, what a refreshment it is to read there of our Surety, of the God who changes not, of the Stone cut with no human hand –– the Lord Jesus Christ –– and of His Dominion which is an everlasting dominion and His Kingdom which will never be destroyed! (See Daniel 2, as well as the rest of the book.) May our God grant us grace upon grace to know and to savor Him as exceedingly precious!

As way of update, another sister in Christ and myself have begun praying for revival on a regular basis. All praise, glory, honor, and thanksgiving to God for that! There was no fleshly compulsion, convincing, manipulation, or scheming required on my part, but the LORD alone did this thing, and I am glad! Psalm 118:23. Isaiah 56:7 Even them I will bring to My holy mountain, And make them joyful in My house of prayer.

However, in spite of that great blessing, because I was setting my eyes on the outward appearance and the current state of things, several times as of late, I had found myself lapsing and questioning and seeking God's assurance in the place He has me –– even though He had given it to me time and again, and yes, I did go back to recall those times. And yet, I still found myself very much in a similar state to that of God's people in the first part of Haggai 2: they'd seen the former glory (or had heard of it) –– and the current temple looked as NOTHING in comparison, and their hearts were sinking and they were sorely tempted to be distressed and dismayed. They'd lost their vision of the God who was present with them, as well as His covenant promises in the past, and His covenant promises yet to be accomplished in the future (see Haggai 2:1-9).

I was sitting in our worship service last Sunday morning, with questions filling my mind and very little expectation, grieving and fairly distraught at the prospects, even though that really made no logical sense at all in light of all God has been doing as of late and how He has continued to encourage me all along the way. Yet, the devil loves to entangle us and bring us down, doesn't he, and very often that happens after spiritual victory, e.g. - Elijah in I Kings 19.

But then, my eyes and affections and heart were all lifted above, as we sang "O Little Town of Bethlehem." In particular that emphasis on the word "little." Afterwards, I turned to Micah 5: "But you, Bethlehem Ephrathah, though you are little, yet out of you..." Bethlehem = house of bread. Ephrathah = fruitfulness. O, Lord, we are so very far from that! Nevertheless, at the same time, the Scripture WAS such a great encouragement to me... because it continues on: "THOUGH you are LITTLE, YET! ..." That's how God always works: through the little, weak, ignoble, foolish, and unwise in the world's eyes (I Cor. 1). And then I turned to Isaiah 60:22: "A little one shall become a thousand, and a small one a strong nation. I the LORD will hasten it in its time." So here I am, along with this other sister. We are meeting in the hope that God will be true to His covenant promises and rend the heavens and come down! It seems preposterous, doesn't it? How can two women praying make any difference? And yet, that's so often how revivals begin. (More below...)

Later in Micah 5 I read this verse: "THEN the remnant of His brethren SHALL RETURN to the children of Israel..." The remnant shall return. There's no doubt of that at all! And, on top of that: "AND HE SHALL STAND AND FEED HIS FLOCK in the strength of the LORD, in the majesty of the name of the LORD His God..."  And so, from that Scripture from which Phillips Brooks wrote that old carol, there was a little heavenly feeding for my downcast soul that morning! Glory to God! Our Father never fails to satisfy our souls with His mercies! They are new every morning! O! That we might go to His throne in our time of need, to make use of His appointed means of grace, and open our mouths, so the Bread of Heaven might drop down and feed us!

I regret to say, that in spite of that, as there were further things I'd become aware of, instead of my vision continuing to be lifted, I found it being taken down, down, down, and I became further distraught.

On my other blog, in my post "Silent Night - Not! ...," I'd quoted John Piper: "There are sorrows we must pray to feel." (see Jeremiah  8:21-9:1). The calling to pray includes a calling to sorrow, but not a fleshly, self-absorbed, despairing sorrow, but rather a hopeful sorrow that propels us upward, so we might cry out to God in expectant prayer with thanksgiving, much like the apostle Paul, "sorrowful, yet always rejoicing." A few days ago, I found myself listening to a sermon by the Rev. Geoff Thomas on Nehemiah 1, and I had to stop, and weep and rejoice all at the same time –– for it is a grace and blessing to see the ruins and grieve, and at the same time, it is a grace and blessing to be led into importunate prayer for the house of God to be restored, to press on for the joy set before us.

Later that day, I walked quite a long time and poured out my heart to God about these things (to whom could I go?!). I laid out my complaint, went through the promises of God, both general as well as specific, which He has given to me. I came to a point where I was saying something like this: "As my days, so shall my strength be. Would You send me all I need to persevere with joy, a felt assurance to my soul again, even though You have done this so many times. And yet, BECAUSE YOU HAVE done this so many times, I am coming to You again in faith. If You don't go with me.. If You don't make Yourself SPECIALLY present..." And not long after that, I did have a sense that my prayers were heard, and knew He would come to refresh me again somehow, some way...

Late that night, as I lay down on my pillow, almost the millisecond I did so, these words came like a fire into my soul to bring a flood of joy and peace in believing: "Let the people praise You! Let ALL the people praise you!" (from Psalm 67.) As Payson said, "Who wants candles when He has the sun!" I HAD THE SON! I felt it as if God were giving me strong consolation (Heb. 6:8), as if He were saying:  "Yes! Yes! You are right to be burdened about these things, Karen, and the end of it all, the end of your prayers is this: MY praise. Though you are little, though it seems I have not heard your prayers, though all looks like a wilderness, I have heard your prayers, so keep on praying without ceasing. One day I will come again, and there will be a fruitful field."

I know how easy it is to become discouraged, and I only share that as an encouragement to you, to take hold of the horns of the altar, to take hold of the hem of Christ's garment, to wrestle with Him all night, not to be silent, not to give Him rest until He blesses you individually with His presence, and until He makes Jerusalem a praise in the earth once again (blesses His Church corporately with His presence). The corporate revival may not happen in our lifetimes, but I pray that you might begin to have the sun to sustain you in this dark and cloudy day, i.e. - to have the LORD shine His face upon you in this day of small things! As I quoted Edward Griffin in my previous post, I want to help you in any way I can so you might press on along with me in "praying for a revival of religion."

Now, a little more regarding the blessing of God coming out of smallness...

I was reading Psalm 147 last night and again this morning, and then began reading Matthew Henry on it, and came to a wonderful portion regarding the first couple verses, which I'd like to share with you. First off, the Scripture (KJV), followed by Henry's commentary on it. (Italics, original; boldface, mine.)

Psalm 147:1  Praise ye the LORD: for it is good to sing praises unto our God; for it is pleasant; and praise is comely. 2  The LORD doth build up Jerusalem: he gathereth together the outcasts of Israel. 3  He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds.

 II. God is recommended to us as the proper object of our most exalted and enlarged praises, upon several accounts.

      1. The care he takes of his chosen people, 2. Is Jerusalem to be raised out of small beginnings? Is it to be recovered out of its ruins? In both cases, The Lord builds up Jerusalem. The gospel-church, the Jerusalem that is from above, is of this building. He framed the model of it in his own counsels; he founded it by the preaching of his gospel; he adds to it daily such as shall be saved, and so increases it. He will build it up unto perfection, build it up as high as heaven. Are any of his people outcasts? Have they made themselves so by their own folly? He gathers them by giving them repentance and bringing them again into the communion of saints. Have they been forced out by war, famine, or persecution? He opens a door for their return; many that were missing, and thought to be lost, are brought back, and those that were scattered in the cloudy and dark day are gathered together again.

As I read that, those words The Lord builds up Jerusalem really impacted and blessed me. Yes! The Lord builds up Jerusalem! i.e. - not Karen! Jerusalem is to be raised out of small beginnings. Jerusalem is to be recovered out of its ruins. How? The Lord Himself is The Builder of His Church, and the gates of hell will not prevail against her! ... So many wonderful associated Scriptures, but one that comes to mind now is Amos 9:11-12:

"On that day I will raise up
The tabernacle of David,
which has fallen down,
And repair its damages;
I will raise up its ruins,
And rebuilt it as in the days of old;
That they may possess the remnant of Edom (or, mankind)
And all the Gentiles who are called by My name,"
Says the LORD who does this thing.

(Just a little note here:  there are multiple layers to this prophecy... First off, in the return from exile and the rebuilding of the temple and the city of Jerusalem, but primarily in the Lord Jesus Christ humbling Himself and coming to earth as a babe to born under the law, to live a sinless life, and to suffer and die and be raised again for the sin of the world –– good news of great joy for ALL people, both Jews and Gentiles. The prophecy looks forward to the ingathering of the Gentiles (the verse is quoted by James at the Jerusalem council in Acts 15, in explaining the activity of God's Holy Spirit in the conversion of the Gentiles). But, in addition, I believe it to be a picture of the times of refreshing that come to the Church periodically throughout Church history, according to God's good pleasure, when the Spirit of God graciously descends in reviving fire.) But my point in sharing it with you here is particularly that last portion:

"Says the LORD who does this thing."

Like Abraham, let us (let me) not be weak in faith, let us (let me) not waver in unbelief, but be fully convinced that what God has promised He is also able to perform! (Romans 4:13-25) Our Lord Himself told us that He would not leave us as orphans, but He would come to us! That's a promise not only to the individual Christian, but also a promise to the Church corporate! O! The day will come when He will come again in power and glory! He will awake and arise, and will pluck His hand out of His bosom on behalf of His people for the sake of His name, for there are sheep yet to be gathered into His one fold, and so often that ingathering occurs as the Church herself is revived... So much more I would love to say on that, but just look at Isaiah 60 (among other places in the Scripture). I don't know if He will come in revival in my lifetime, that is up to Him. But I know that my prayers will continue to ascend to His throne long after I am dust!

Before I close, one more Scripture on smallness. Once more I'm tapping into Matthew Henry and his commentary on Bildad's counsel to Job in Job 8:7 (once again italics, original; boldface, mine):

He [Bildad] gives him [Job] good hopes that he shall yet again see good days, secretly suspecting, however, that he was not qualified to see them. He assures him that, if he would be early in seeking God, God would awake for his relief, would remember him and return to him, though now he seemed to forget him and forsake him--that if his habitation were righteous it should be prosperity. When we return to God in a way of duty we have reason to hope that he will return to us in a way of mercy. Let not Job object that he had so little left to being the world with again that it was impossible he should ever prosper as he had done; no, "Though thy beginning should be ever so small, a little meal in the barrel and a little oil in the cruse, God's blessing shall multiply that to a great increase." This is God's way of enriching the souls of his people with graces and comforts, not per saltum--as by a bound, but per gradum--step by step. The beginning is small, but the progress is to perfection. Dawning light grows to noonday, a grain of mustard seed to a great tree. Let us not therefore despise the day of small things, but hope for the day of great things.

So often, I become impatient and expect the bound (or the hop! ~ as google translate renders that phrase)... Help me, Lord Jesus, to be happy with Your ways and Your timing! "You will arise and have mercy on Zion; For the time to favor her, Yes, the set time, will come..." (see Psalm 102). May each one of us bring a little meal and a little oil, i.e. - humbly bring to Him our "small" amount of prayers with thanksgivings, not to despise the day of small things, but to hope for the day of great things, to trust Almighty God to bless and to multiply our prayers to a great increase in His time (consider what our Lord did with those five loaves and two fishes!)

I'll close by adding to Henry's own words,

"Let us not therefore despise the day of small things, but hope for the day of great things."

these of the apostle Paul:

"Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us." (Romans 5:5)

"As it is written:

Behold, I lay in Zion a stumbling stone and rock of offense,
And whoever believes on Him will not be put to shame."
(Romans 9:33)

Contrary to hope, may we, like Abraham, believe! (Romans 4:18) Lord, we believe. Help, Lord, our unbelief! Help, Lord, my unbelief!

May each of you have a very blessed Christmas season and know Christ's life more abundantly as you seek His face! ~ Psalm 69:32b.